Uncertainties
by Kopy.Kunoichi
Summary: Fuu doesn't want the adventure to end...and she really doesn't want to leave Jin. What to do, what to do? R&R my friends!
1. Uncertainties

** – Hey, so I know it's not the most popular pairing in the universe but hey…I thought they were cute together. So…sorry Shino maybe next time (when your name doesn't make me think of bug-boy from Naruto). **

**Uncertainties**

Tall, dark and handsome.

Jin.

That's what he was. In addition to the basics, he was also chivalrous (in a quiet, subdued kind of way), strong, considerate, and kind of a romantic. Well, romantic in that he fell in love with and then rescued a trapped wife-turned-prostitute from a life of misery. He'd never see her again…probably. But that was small consolation since he would never fall in love with me either. Stupid unfair life. Why wasn't I older? Prettier? Curvier? Dammit – curse Mugen and his infatuation with pointing out my flaws every single freaking day!

It didn't even matter though, because no matter what I looked like, I was still me and he'd never love me for me because he was so much more mature than I'd ever be. Hey, I rhymed! Focus Fuu. I mean, technically – he was only like four years older than me – which is not much at all. But he acted so much older! Like he'd been forced to grow up young. Stark contrast to dogface who behaved like a child…a very perverted womanizing child.

Why me? Why do I torture myself with unrequited love? Am I a masochist at heart? Damn it all to hell! I took the diary that I hadn't written a word of this in – because Mugen was a snoop but he couldn't read so he'd make Jin read it for him, and he would because Mugen could talk him into anything – and threw it against the wall. I did this at the exact moment the object of my frustrations entered the deserted hut we were staying in. Jin gave me a startled look as Mugen just grunted in his sleep and rolled over. I turned my angry expression on Jin, getting up to push past him. He called my name as I stepped into the humid night air.

"Leave me alone," I ground out between my teeth, silencing him.

I stormed off into the woods, following a little trail that led to the river. I knew it was wrong to snap at him like that. After all, it wasn't his fault he wasn't in love with me. Our journey…our adventures were coming to an end. No more Jin and Mugen to bail me out of trouble every time someone tried to kidnap me. I'd probably be dead on the street within a week. But I had almost found him – the samurai who smelled of sunflowers. Father. And when I did, I was going to give him a piece of my mind. And then I'd leave…and be alone again. Jin and Mugen would go their separate ways – if they didn't kill each other first that is. And I'd have to find work soon or I'd starve.

My walk was taking me further and further down the riverbank. It was a beautiful night, I had to admit. The moon was full and the stars were shining bright as diamonds. Fragrant night flowers filled the air with their sweet scent. But I was way too emo to appreciate any of it.

Just when I was thinking my life couldn't suck anymore than it did right now, Buddha threw me a curve. Some flying…creature…flew out of the trees right in my face. I could feel the _whoosh _of air from its wings on my skin – it was that close! So naturally, I freaked. I ran back the way I'd come, screaming like a banshee. About half-way back I realized it was probably just an owl or bat or something…but I kept running sans the screams. That was roughly the same time I ran headlong into something hard and immovable. It grabbed me. I screamed some more. And then it made me look at it, holding my face still. It looked like Jin. Wait…it was Jin. And then to my utter dismay and horror, I was reduced to a sobbing heap of lard. I threw my arms around his waist and cried out all my woes into the front of his gi.

I told him about the winged spawn of Satan that had just tried to devour my soul. Hey…no one said I didn't have a gift for drama. I was far more upset that we were going to be separated soon, but if Jin thought I was crying about the owl and/or pterodactyl it was okay. He surprised me by wrapping me up in his arms and rubbing my back in a comforting way. He reassured me about the animal (which I couldn't care less about) and told me it was okay because he was here now. Thanks Jin, like I'm not painfully aware of the fact that you're here…hugging me…in the freaking moonlight! The gods were mocking me…that's all there was to it. He pulled away, regarding my – I'm sure – hideous, tear-streaked face with a look of sympathy.

"Let's sit down here for a while," he suggested, gesturing to a patch of grass by the riverbank.

I accepted of course, kind of curious. Jin of all people was not a let's-sit-down-and-talk kind of person. He probably just wanted to sit and not say anything at all. But he was just full of surprises tonight, because he asked me what was really bothering me. Now was the moment of truth. To lie or not to lie? I debated for a moment. He would know if I lied anyway and I was going to lose him either way, so why not tell the truth?

"I was just thinking that pretty soon we'll all be going our separate ways. And well, I guess I've grown attached to you two and I don't really want the adventures to end."

"I understand. I suspected as much – you haven't written in your diary in a long time."

"Why – did Mugen have you read it?"

"No, I just noticed that when you pull it out you're not actually writing in it."

"Oh. Yeah, I just…I don't know. I'm gonna miss you guys," I sniffled back unwanted tears.

"I know Fuu. We'll miss you too…even if he never says it out loud."

I laughed, "Yeah that's for sure. He'll miss having someone to humiliate on a regular basis."

"Everything has to end at some point Fuu. Our travels together have been…interesting to say the least."

"But why? Why does our fun have to end so soon? Is this quest the only thing holding us together – even now?" I sighed, acting on an impulse to lay my head against his arm. "I don't want to be alone again, that's all."

He stayed still, permitting me to rest against him. He remained silent though, no words of comfort came from his lips. Pretty lips…I thought sleepily. I was so tired – I didn't realize how much so until just then. I drank in Jin's soft, masculine scent and listened to his deep, even breaths, letting it lull me. I didn't even remember falling asleep, or being carried back to cabin, or the gift he gave me that night.

---+~+---

Jin kept silent as she admitted her true fear to him. Loneliness. He wondered if she knew just how much he disliked the idea himself. Much as he hated to admit it, he did enjoy their travels. Mugen with his big mouth, and Fuu with her ridiculous ability to attract trouble like a magnet had allowed him to stay an active samurai for far longer than he had thought possible. He stole a sideways glance at the girl when he felt her head slip against his shoulder a little. She was asleep. He liked her when she slept…she was quiet and innocent. She was innocent when she was awake too…dangerously so. She got into a lot of scrapes for just one girl. He wondered what would happen to her without Mugen or him to protect her. He shuddered a little when his mind conjured up an image of her broken body in the street…like so many others he had seen. He pushed it aside, reasoning that she was an intelligent girl; she would find a new guardian. Yet somehow, that didn't make him feel better either. The idea of another man protecting her in his stead pulled at his chest. No one else could guard her life as well as he had…what if the bastard tried to take advantage of her? But he was being absurd. He couldn't spend his whole life protecting this accident-prone girl!

He peered down at her again when a little sigh escaped her lips in her sleep. He shifted, very carefully lifting her in his arms. She barely stirred, she must be exhausted. He took her back to the empty shack, laying her down on some old blankets. She lie there, vulnerable to the world…a small smile on her full lips. His eyes swept over her mouth, a familiar burning sensation searing through his gut. Without even looking to see if Mugen was still asleep, he leaned down to place a gentle, chaste kiss on her lips. He wondered afterwards what had prompted him to do that, and why he had given in. He also wondered if he would truly be able to abandon her when the time came. He wondered until sleep claimed him. He wondered even after that.

**So much wondering. There will be a second chapter eventually…when I get to it. We'll see what he finally decides in the end. Or perhaps…fate will choose for him. Dun, dun, duuuuuun.**


	2. Decision

** - Hey guys. I'm sorry that this has taken me so long to put up here – I've been sick for like a month and half. But here it is…hope you enjoy. R&R as always! Love to all!**

He had done it. He had left them both. She never asked him to stay, not after what he had done for her. She remembered staring a her own death when the man who had just slain her terminally ill father, cornered her on the cliff. She thought about jumping – it may be better than just giving up here. But then she saw him. He was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen, as he walked slowly towards them in the bright sunlight. His hair was loose and blowing in the summer breeze, his glasses gone, and the top of his gi was hanging away from him. He was badly injured, but that didn't stop him from allowing himself to be impaled to gain an opening to kill this man. He had told her afterward it was the only way to defeat him, as she nursed him and Mugen back to health.

When they were ready, they went to the place where the road split…and went off in three separate directions. She knew in her heart she would probably see them again one day. She hoped so anyway. She put on a happy face as she made her way across rice fields, then entered a forest – following her feet down an unfamiliar road. She happened across a wide stream that ran parallel the road, reminding her of that night about a week ago when she had emptied her fears on Jin. She recalled his voice, what he had said to her, his smell…everything. She replayed their adventures in her mind over and over, laughing at some of the memories and crying over others. She decided to sit down by the river and rest for a bit, even though she had only been walking for about two hours. The more she sat and thought about it, the more she regretted leaving them. She should have told Jin how she felt about him before going. He was leaving her anyway, so what did she really have to lose? Now, she would have to go through life wondering what could have been. She knew that her chances were slim, but as long as there was even the smallest glimmer of hope, she should have been honest. We only have one life to live, and sometimes that life is shorter than we anticipated – so shouldn't we throw caution to the wind and take some chances? What was that saying? Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Her mind was made up. She was going to find Jin and tell him that she loved him more than anything else in the world! With that goal in mind, she set off at a run in the direction she had come from. After about ten minutes of that though, she decided to walk – he'd have to stop for the night too, right? She kept up a steady pace though, determined to find him before tomorrow.

* * *

Jin walked past a monastery, glancing over some of the old architecture. It didn't really interest him though. All he seemed to be able to do was recap over the events of the last year. He should be focused on where he was headed, not where he had been. Furthermore, he needed to find work soon if he was going to eat. That was not an easy task for an ex-Samurai. He barely had enough for dinner tonight, and he was the kind of man who could eat a lot and still not be full. Not to the extent that Fuu packed away the groceries of course – he recalled the time they had a food-eating competition. There he went again, reminiscing about the past. He couldn't get her out of his head. The look on her face when she left them had been hopeful, but he knew she'd be bawling her eyes out in a rice patty within an hour's time. He had to let her go, she wasn't his responsibility anymore. He had nearly died to save her – his duty was done. But if he cared for her enough to do that – how could he just leave her now the way he did? What if something happened to her? The road from where they had been, back to Tokyo was crawling with bandits. She could be robbed, beaten, killed even. He refused to think about what other evils might befall her. A young, beautiful girl traveling alone…what had he been thinking? He should have at least gone with her to the nearest station – she could have gotten to Tokyo safely from there. If she ran into trouble – she wouldn't know what to do…then she would panic and start running her mouth and get herself into even more trouble. He had to get a hold of himself; this was ridiculous. She had to grow up and stop relying on people eventually. After all, that's what she had been doing before she met them.

He found himself walking down a hill into a small town. He knew he should just keep going, but he decided to stop in a little tea stand for a bit. He got a drink and sat down at the front bar, sipping away and thinking. All this pondering was going to get him into trouble. Nonetheless, he stayed rooted to the spot, diving into the recesses of his tormented mind. His thoughts went to Shino, and he tried to evaluate his feelings for her. He had fallen in love with her the first night they had met, preparing eels together by that bridge. He felt sorry for her – her desperate situation had pulled at his heart. Anyone would feel pity for a woman forced into prostitution to pay off her husband's gambling debts though. But he had found her grace and beauty enchanting. Still, that didn't change the fact that she was another man's wife. And although he had rescued her from that life, she would never be allowed to break her marriage. Even if he could get past that fact, he would still have to wait another few years before she could leave the safe house. And he was facing another problem. As quickly as his feelings for her had appeared, they began to fade away when he departed. What Shino needed was a man with a steady job and a stable home. Jin might never have that. He wanted to be able to plant roots eventually, but he was still young and restlessly looking for the next adventure. He had been entranced by Shino; but what Jin really needed – what he really wanted – was a woman who would share his journeys with him. Someone who would follow him, trust him to keep her safe and gladly stay by his side.

He desired to be needed…and no one in the world needed him more than Fuu. And he had just abandoned her without a real goodbye even! He thought about going back and finding her. But if he did that, would she be able to forgive him? Well, Fuu had put up with a lot from him and Mugen, and she _had _always forgiven them. He supposed he should at least try. Did he really care for her that much though? A voice inside him reminded him that he had almost died to protect her. He had told himself that his greatest desire was to defeat the samurai who had nearly killed him, but he knew the truth. It was not a desire to seek revenge or win a fight that had pulled him out of that water – Fuu was in danger, and nothing was going to stop him from saving her. He couldn't let that man kill her…not while there was breath left in his body. Did he truly love her enough to die for her? If he were placed in that situation again, what would he do?

The answer came to him immediately.

He wouldn't have changed a thing. He was done arguing with himself. The truth was, he loved Fuu enough to die for her – not because it was his job, but because there was nothing in this world worth the cost of her life. And was going to tell her that – right now….once he found her. He glanced at the clock behind the bar; it was early afternoon, he had wasted several hours here. He would need to hurry if he was going to catch her before nightfall. Hopefully she had reached the first town and stayed there rather than continue on. He paid the man at the bar, adjusting his swords.

"You look like a man who's just made up his mind about something important," the barkeep commented.

Jin offered him a wry smile, "Yes, I have."

He left the tea place without another word, making his way back toward the edge of town and to the road that would lead him to Fuu. But then he heard something that stopped him dead in his tracks. A familiar voice was pleading with a group of men off to his right. They were crowded in a circle in front of a food stand, more than one of them armed with a heavy, blunt object.

"Now boys, let's not be hasty here. We can talk this through, can't we?" the little voice was saying.

His stomach nearly leapt to his throat when he heard her. Without hesitation, he rushed into the fray, just as thug number one reached the end of his patience. Fuu's cry for help was cut off when she immediately recognized her rescuer, who was now standing between her and the guy who was about to bludgeon her – blocking his two-by-four with the hilt of his sword.

"Jin," she whispered, just loud enough for him to hear her.

He decided that his name on her lips was the sweetest sound in the world. But he didn't really have time to contemplate that fact too long, because all hell broke lose. Fuu managed to scramble out of the way as Jin took on all six thugs, dealing with them quickly and decisively. Within moments, the fight was over, and Jin stood knee deep in battered, unconscious bodies. He turned to look down at her as she crawled out from her hiding place behind the vending stand.

"Jin, why are you still here?" she asked in disbelief.

He paused for a moment, weighing his words, "Because this was how far I got before I decided I couldn't leave you."

She approached him slowly, holding his gaze as she closed the gap between them. They regarded each other for a long moment, both relieved to have found one another, but unsure of what to do next.

Naturally, she broke the silence first, "You were coming back for me?"

He nodded before asking, "What are _you _doing here?"

She took a deep breath before launching into her explanation, "Well you see, I kind of got to thinking while I was on the road that it was really stupid of me to leave you without telling you how I really feel, because even if you don't feel the same way about me, what exactly do I have to lose because you are leaving anyway…so you could just leave not knowing that I really care about you, or you could leave knowing that I love you more than anything else in the world and possibly maybe perhaps stay with me because you feel kind of the same way or maybe you – "

She stopped talking when he yanked her the rest of the way to him and planted his mouth firmly on hers. She talked way too much…he always thought so.

He pulled back after a moment, suppressing a smile as he took in her dumbfounded expression, his eyes lingering on her swollen lips.

"Does that answer your question?"

She only nodded, her cheeks still flushed bright pink. He leaned in to kiss her again but stopped when he caught the sound of footsteps headed their way. He groaned when he heard angry yells from the police.

"Fuu, what did you do this time?"

She looked at him sheepishly, pointing her index fingers together, "Well, you see…"

"Never mind, just come on," he said, grabbing her and running in the opposite direction.

And thus their adventures continued…

The End

(Or is it?)

**Mkay, so I have an epilogue floating around in my head that I might just have to add in here. Something along the lines of Mugen inadvertently crashing a wedding…or something. Oh the possibilities. :D**


End file.
